I Never Knew

When it comes to my gaming choices I tend to veer towards the old familiar genres of my comfort zone--the carpal tunnel numbness of mad-clicking ARPG's, the life sucking 100 hour playthroughs of the modern RPG, a stylishly popular indie about something socially relevant, and possibly a little strategy.  Every once in awhile I decide to veer from this decidedly rote path and play something a little out of my ordinary.  Sadly, this choice had led me to some games that have remained firmly parked in my library with little to no play time (I'm looking at you Spelunky).  This time around I think I stumbled on a real gem though...and it's not even in a genre or type of game that I'm comfortable admitting that I play.  I never knew I wanted to be a sexy, British accented witch from hell, but thanks to Bayonetta my horizons have been broadened.

I'm pretty sure I've posted this same statement several times on my blog--I'm not really into anime or anime style games.  I'm so not really into it that I've actually disabled "anime" as a tag on my Steam discovery feed (for awhile there it seemed like there were many, many variations of the hot anime girls in tiny costumes and impossibly large boobs type of games inundating my queue--all thanks to playing The Valkyria Chronicles and Steam deciding that one game was enough to decide that I needed to see every new anime game in the store).  When Bayonetta started popping up on the top seller list on Steam I scoffed at yet another weird anime game.  Here's where I admit how wrong I was--Bayonetta is the perfect combination of fun yet challenging combat, quirkiness, and complete irreverence.  You should buy it....now!

One of the many irreverent moments sprinkled throughout Bayonetta.

Bayonetta was originally released as a console-only game seven years ago.  The PC port and release seemed to be a surprise--I only read about it because it kept popping up on some of the PC gaming threads that I follow.

In Bayonetta you play as a time-bending, lollipop sucking, leather-clad, witch who is recovering from a bad case of amnesia.  You shouldn't think of the traditional "broomstick" type of witch--Bayonetta is a lithe, martial artist who can manipulate time.  Oh and she also has guns attached to her high heels.  And can perform powerful magical attacks using her hair....which can transform into giant monsters.  Yup, it's kind of weird--but it's also wicked fun.

The combat in Bayonetta is probably the best part of the game.  Bayonetta herself is locked in some sort of eternal struggle against the forces of heaven and is constantly fending off attacks by the various (really weird) minions of Paradiso.  Combat is based on combination attacks executed by artfully timed punches and kicks.  The really unique aspect of the combat is the ability to perform a perfectly timed dodge which results in entering what is known as "witch time"--a state of temporarily slowed time that allows players to crank out powerful combo attacks.  As players complete these combos, Bayonetta's magical attack meter fills up.  If the correct combo is performed she will use a unique, powerful magic attack.  There are other times in combat where players have the option of perform "torture" attacks that utilize a variety of torture devices and mad-clicking to determine their effectiveness.  I still haven't figured out exactly what triggers the option to use a torture attack.  After you've stylishly slain your way through masses of smaller enemies you will reach the true crux of combat--the boss fight.  The bosses in Bayonetta tend to be giant monstrosities that take a few tries to figure out.  These long, drawn out battles are frustrating but oh so satisfying to finish.

The level of stylish cinematics and downright silliness balance each other out perfectly.  There are moments where I am in awe of Bayonetta performing a crazy move and then there are others where I am rolling my eyes at cheesy dialogue.  If anything, it's a game that doesn't take itself too seriously.  In the middle of a fight you might grab an enemy and get the option to "punish" it and mash the punch button to repeatedly slam it into the ground.  Bayonetta's moves are part martial arts and part stripper--it's a really weird combination.

Something I really enjoyed that might seem silly is Bayonetta's ability to "witch walk."  Witch walking can only take place when the moon is visible and allows her to walk across any surface--at several points throughout the game you have to navigate the sides of buildings or wind your way up a nauseating spiral tower.  Even though the game is linear this feature adds an entirely new dimension to some boss fights and different parts of the story.

My one major gripe is the camera and it's inability to stay in the right place.  This has been a long time issue for me with many console style games.  It's a little irritating to have the camera lodge itself in a location where you can't see the enemies you are fighting.  The camera movement isn't the worst I've ever dealt with, but it can be annoying.

At first glance Bayonetta might appear to be a tits n' ass punch em' up--it's true, there are definite aspects of that, but if you push past you will find yourself in the midst of a really bizarre story punctuated by genuinely fun bursts of combat.  It's unlike anything I've ever played and I don't regret buying it for one second.